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Timely Warning Notifications of Criminal Incidents for UW Seattle

On November 21st, 2008 at approximately 3:58 p.m., Seattle Police Department officers responded to the report of a strong arm robbery that occurred in the 1400 block of N.E. 50th Street in the alley east of University Way. The victim (a female) was walking eastbound on the north sidewalk of N.E. 50th Street when two males and one female emerged form the alley. One of the males wrapped his arm around the victim’s throat and held her while the other male went through the pockets of her jeans. The female suspect stood there and watched. A pre-paid cell phone and $500.00 in cash was taken from the pockets of the victim.

On Thursday, November 20, 2008, at approximately 2:40 p.m., a UW female student was the victim of a robbery at the bus stop in the 4600 block of 25th Avenue N.E. Four suspects were involved in this incident, two males and two females. One suspect, a female wearing a black puffy jacket, blue jeans, and red shoes, took the victim’s cell phone. After taking the cell phone, the female suspects left on foot, and the two male accomplices boarded a bus. The male suspects were later located on the bus and arrested by Seattle Police. The female suspects are both still at large. The victim was not injured.

On Friday, November 14, 2008, at approximately 10:45 p.m., a UW student was the victim of an attempted robbery at the corner of N.E. 45th St. and 16th Ave N.E.. The suspect, a female with long straight blonde hair, approached the victim and attempted to steal her purse. The victim wrestled with the suspect, they separated, and the victim ran into a nearby house for safety. The suspect then took off running in a northbound direction. The suspect was wearing a black puffy jacket with fur around the hood. The victim was not injured.

On Thursday November 13, 2008 at 3:20 pm, a male UW student was walking eastbound on the Burke Gilman Trail under the 45th Street viaduct. According to the victim, the suspect who was described as a 6′, 250 lb male jumped out of the bushes, grabbed his wallet out of his hand and assaulted him with a stick. The suspect took the victim’s cash out of his wallet and threw the wallet on the ground. The suspect departed in an unknown direction. The victim sustained a bump on his head and was released by the Fire Department at the scene.

On Monday, October 20, 2008, at 10:23 p.m., a 19 year old male student was robbed by two men while walking southbound on Brooklyn Ave. N.E. where it intersects the Burke-Gilman trail. The suspects approached the victim from behind and implied they had a gun, but none was seen. The victim was not injured. The suspects fled the area after taking personal belongings from the victim; some of the victim’s property was located a short distance away. The victim did the right thing by not struggling with the suspects; no amount of property is worth risking your personal safety.

On Sunday, October 19, 2008, at approximately 1:30 a.m., a 24 year old male student was assaulted by an individual with a folding knife near the intersection of NE 50th and 17th Ave. NE, Seattle. Just prior to the assault the victim and the suspect, who was unknown to the victim, had been arguing. The victim sustained a stab wound to his leg and was treated at UW Medical Center. The suspect fled the area prior to the arrival of police.

The UW Police Department has received confirmation of an incident that occurred on September 20, 2008, on an outdoor stairway that connects 21st Avenue Northeast to 22nd Avenue Northeast near Northeast 52nd Street. Sometime after midnight a man assaulted a 21 year old female student by punching her, jumping on top of her and groping her. The suspect is described as a Caucasian male, wearing a black hoodie style top and blue jeans. The student was able to push her attacker away and run to safety.

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In order to decrease the chances of becoming a victim of crime, you should:

* Walk with friends, especially late at night or early morning hours.
* Use the Husky Nightwalk services by calling 685-WALK(9255)
* Be aware of your environment and alert for possible danger.
* Remove yourself from potentially dangerous situations as soon as possible.
* Call 911 to report suspicious activity or persons to the police.

In order to decrease the chances of becoming a victim of crime you should…

…tell the UW Police Department to do its fuckin’ job!!!

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Hydrocarbon Girl

In a bar called Madam’s Organ, in the neighborhood of Adams Morgan, we got smashed proper. We consumed huge-ass fried chicken dinners with fried okra and candied yams. I had four scotch-and-sodases, two touchdowns (that I called field goals), a couple of froofy-assed “tic-tacs” that came recommended by the hot waitress that my friend fell in love with cuz she had the molecular structure of dopamine tattooed on her hip. She said I was old because I drank scotch. I called her “Hydrocarbon Girl” and she didn’t like it. We spent a lot of money…a lot of money. We had exotic women from eastern Europe sit with us but not for very long cuz we were getting more obnoxiouser by the second. I bet the cab fare that Steely Dan did not sing Black Water and was amazed to learn that the Doobie Brothers did. Michael McDonald was in both bands so nobody won the bet although technically I did. We ended up walking home (by home I mean hotel) and my friend had to pee on a dumpster. Oh yeah, my poster went well…I guess.

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Misc. Debris

Old Skool Neuroscience


Because my lab has got more personnel than equipment, I had to go all “Hodgkin & Huxley” and shit and build this analog device from scratch. It rectifies then integrates multi-unit muscle potentials. Had I the necessary data-acquisition card and LabVIEW software, could I have programmed an equivalent device in an hour flat? Shit yes! Alas, such resources are not made available to me, Mr. Low-Man-on-the-Totem-Pole, in my lab (see: reinventing the wheel). I’m glad the mind-numbing ‘tronix class I took 8 years ago finally paid off.

Articulated Bus Scare

Nearly every morning, the bus I take makes the above-depicted maneuver to keep its ass-end out of Lake City traffic while passengers board. And nearly every morning I flip during the 10 feet or so it has me in its sights.

Bad Vibe Transmission (or Just Desserts)

A couple nights ago at the club, not one, but two dudes hit on me. I wasn’t exactly flattered. One of whom I shoved proper the fourth time he got too close for comfort. Lucky for me no bouncer was watching, otherwise I would have found myself shoved right out of the club. Later, I apologized to the guy…then he asked me to dance. That prompted my escape. Walking to my car I slipped on a metal grating and now suffer a massive waffle bruise on my thigh.

In-between Pants
Next week I’m going to present this…


at the Society for Neuroscience annual meeting in Washington DC. I’ve got two suits: one has pants that fit my circa 2002 28″ waist, the pants of the other are 36″ around. At the moment my waist circumference is 32″. I could risk pinching off my digestive tract for a day or pack plenty of safety pins.

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Somebody had a bad case of the Mondays…